Real World featuring Pirates of the Caribbean
by Cap'nGeech
Summary: Ever wonder what would happen to the PotC cast on the Real World? Now you can find out! Watch as Jack cries, Will screams, and Norrington is frightened out of his mind! ON HIATUS!
1. Meet the Housemates!

Title: Real World: Pirates of the Caribbean

Disclaimer: I don't owe anyhting in this story except for the plot, the nameless host, and Hailey. Pirates of the Caribbean belongs to Disney, I believe. The Real World belongs to MTV.

A/N: There is some Elizabeth bashing in this because she aggravates me to no end. And the characters may seem a little off...but that's because that's how I wanted it. So get over it.

A/N(2): The PotC cast has been brought into the future to be on the show. Some of my friends who read this were confused so I figured I'd let you know.

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Real World: Pirates of the Caribbean

A nameless host walked out on stage and said, "Welcome to a new season of the Real World." The audience clapped loudly. "Okay, okay calm down. This season we have a surprise for you all. Instead of asking people from all over the US to send in videos, we decided to bring in special guests."

She paused and the audience cheered even more. When they quieted down, she continued. "To help introduce our special guests, we'll bring one audience member up here." The audience got even noisier than before as they jumped up and down, hoping they were the lucky audience member that would be picked. The nameless host looked around and called on a girl with a Jack Sparrow t-shirt on.

The girl walked up on stage and was handed a mic. "So what's your name?" The girl sputtered and finally answered, "Hailey." The host smiled and asked, "Do you like Pirates of the Caribbean, Hailey?" Hailey smiled and said, "Yeah, I love it. I've seen both movies a million times." "Alrighty, then you'll love this season's housemates." Hailey gave the host a confused look. An assistant ran up and gave Hailey some cards. "Read these but not until we give the signal." Hailey nodded and listened to the host blabber on about the new season.

"The house will be in Topeka, Kansas and they will have to live there for two months." Hailey raised an eyebrow. "Why Topeka?" The host turned to her. "Because we haven't had a house there yet," she said through gritted teeth. She turned back to the camera as the assistant gives the signal. Hailey looked down at her cards and started to read.

"This is the first time the housemates have been in the same room together. After this introduction show, they will get on a plane and fly to Topeka." She took a deep breath. "The first housemate is….WHAT!?" She turned toward the grinning host. "Are you serious?" The host nodded and Hailey continued. "The first housemate is Will Turner!" The audience clapped and Will got pushed on stage. He looked around and shielded his eyes from the bright lights. "What am I doing here?" he asked. "How did I get here?" He turned toward Hailey and the host and screamed. "Oh my God!! You're the woman who knocked me out aren't you?" He yelled pointing at the host. She just gave him a crazed smile and shook her head threateningly. Will shivered and stood by Hailey.

"Oh my God! Well, anyways," Hailey said looking down at her cards. "The next housemate is Elizabeth Turner." Elizabeth walked out. Suddenly, the audience got mad and started throwing things at her. She got hit in the face with a shoe and started to cry. "You are all horrible people! My father will see that all of you are put in the gallows!" she yelled at the rampaging crowd. The host pulled out a pistol and shot the ceiling. Everyone shut up and looked at her. "Knock it off," she said and put the pistol away.

Hailey cleared her throat. "And next, the Undead Monkey!" The monkey swung out from backstage and landed on Hailey's shoulder. "Cool."

She looked at her cards again and her eyes went wide. "Wow. The next housemate is Davy Jones!" Everyone froze and watched in fascinated horror as he clunked his way out and stood by Elizabeth. He glared at Hailey to continue.

"Okaaaaaaay! Next, Tia Dahlma!" The strange witch lady came out and smiled at everyone. "Ye all have a touch of destiny about ya. Except you," she said looking at the host. "You will die soon. Very soon." She smiled again and stood by Davy. Everyone's eye twitched and Hailey continued.

"Our sixth housemate t is _former _Commodore James Norrington." Norrington staggered out and fell on his face. He mumbled something into the floor and stood up, regaining his composure. He coughed and straightened his jacket. Elizabeth giggled and pointed. "Haha! You fell!" Norrington sneered at her. "Thank you for pointing out the obvious," he said as he stood next to the nameless host. "Your welcome," Elizabeth said, oblivious to the sarcasm dripping from Norrington's words.

Hailey shook her head and read the next name. "Barbossa!" Barbossa stomped out eating a green apple. He had juice on his chin so Hailey pulled out a handkerchief and handed it to him. "Here, you got something on your chin." He looked at the handkerchief in disgust and pushed her hand away and walked to stand by Norrington. The Undead Monkey jumped from Hailey's shoulder to Barbossa's. "Aww…"

Hailey sighed and looked down at her cards. Her hand clutched her sweater where her heart was like she was having a heart attack and started breathing heavily. Will looked at her and said, "Oh my God! What's wrong?" "The-the name…." Will ya read dit already!" Tia Dalma yelled at her. "And last but not least," Hailey said regaining her composure slightly. "Captain Jack Sparrow!!" She looked toward the entrance expectantly.

Crashes were heard and someone screamed. Then Jack came running out. He took a look around. "Oh bugger. You're all here to kill me aren't you?" Everyone stared at him as he walked up to Hailey and poked her in the chest. "Why you got my face on your womanly parts?" Hailey sighed and fainted. Luckily Will was there to catch her. He laid her on the ground and fanned her face. "Wonder why she did that," Will said. Jack just shrugged and turned to the host. "So, what am I doing here?" The host smiled crazily again and said, "I'm glad you asked."

* * *

Plane Ride

"Please sit down, sir!" yelled the flight attendant. "It's not 'sir'! It's Captain Jack Sparrow," Jack yelled back. A big security guard came up behind and said in a deep voice, "Sir, please sit down or I will tazer you." Jack turned around confused. "What is 'tazer'?" "Here, I'll show you," the guard laughed and stabbed the tazer into Jack's neck. Jack went into convulsions as electricity shot into his neck. "Oh my-" Jack screamed as he fell on the floor. Will, Elizabeth, Tia, Davy, Barbossa, and Norrington all looked at him and laughed. "Jack's trying to be a fish!" Elizabeth said.

Jack stopped convulsing and the guard set him in his seat. The guard laughed and patted Jack's head. "Stay seated." Jack tried to swing at him and mumbled, "Don't…touch…my dirt.: The guard chuckled again. "Funny." He walked back to his seat laughing. Norrington, who was sitting next to Jack, listened to the rum-obsessed pirate mumble about a turkey stealing his rum and sighed. "This is going to be a long flight. Can I get some alcohol over here?"

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Did you like it? Great... Please review and/or flame. Don't matter. I call it "constructive criticism". And if you have any ideas for it, just tell me. Any ideas are welcome. 


	2. Telleyvizon and Cap'n Crunch

**Ch.2 of Real World featuring Pirates of the Caribbean**

**Warning: There is Elizabeth bashing and slight hints of slash. (For those of you who don't know, that's male/male relations)**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Pirates of the Caribbean. If I did, Jack would be tied up in my basement right now...O.o**

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed. I appreciate it. I'm glad you like the story. Same old stuff right? Review please. **

**A/N: Just in case you didn't know, the cast was transported from what ever time they were from in the movie and brought to 2007 to be on the Real World.**

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Ch.2

Norrington walked into the confession booth thing. He sat in the chair and turned on the camera. He sighed and pulled a hand through his hair. "That plane ride was the longest flight ever. The entire time, after Jack was tazed, he mumbled strange things about a jar of dirt and a key." Norrington shook his head. "He was probably dreaming about what happened with Davy Jones's chest. After that he fell asleep." Norrington shivered. "It was horrible. He dreamed about something and he tried to……grope……..me." He shook his head again. "I hope to God I don't have to share a room with him." He stood and walked out.

* * *

Outside, Jack and Elizabeth were arguing about who was going to room with Will. "I want to! We are _engaged_!" Jack scoffed. "Ya know what love? It don't matter. I am 'is best mate. So it will be me that's bunkin' wit dear William Turner." He grabbed Will and his stuff and threw them into one of the rooms. "There. It's finished. Me an' Will are roommates an' you can share wif…..that witch or maybe the former Commodore over there. I hear he still fancies you." 

Jack laughed and sashayed his way into the kitchen to find some rum. Elizabeth stared after him with her mouth hanging open. "I am _not_ rooming with her," Norrington stated with a sneer as he grabbed his stuff and stalked into a different room. Barbossa followed with a dismissive wave of his hand. "Come Jack (the monkey). Let's get settled." Elizabeth sat on the floor and cried. "Nobody wants me!"

Tia shook her head and helped Elizabeth up. "Come on den. Let's get ta our room an' get settled." Tia led the way to the room. Davy stood alone in the living room. "Well I guess I get the room with the big bed." He laughed and clunked into his bedroom.

Will had followed Jack into kitchen and now regretted doing so. Jack had found the nearest alcoholic beverage and downed it. Now, he was giving Will advice. Sorta. "She ain't right fer ya mate. All she does is complain. Why don't ya leave 'er an' find a woman of……of……of sub-sub-substance." Will laughed. "You mean and "upscale" woman who will open her legs at the drop of a hat?" Jack nodded. "Exactly…." He took another swig of his rum. "That's what all men need."

* * *

"My God, she wouldn't shut up at all last night," Tia Dalma said the next morning in the confession booth. "All she did was cry all night about how no one loves her. I tried ta cheer her up by sayin' dey would if she'd stop wit all de cryin' but she just cried even more." Tia shook her head. "I did not get a wink of sleep last night. I'd be amazed if anyone else did." She sighed. "Dis is goin' ta be a long two months."

* * *

"Jack….Jack!" Elizabeth yelled as she poked his face. He slapped her hand away. "Back off you wench. I'm busy wif this young lady at the moment," he said indicating to the broom he was holding. "Wait about….five minutes and I'll be right wif ya, savvy?" Elizabeth giggled. "Jack could you take your business with the broom off the table and into a bedroom?" Jack sat up. "What broom?" 

Elizabeth pointed at the broom. "Oh. I thought," he trailed off. "Will musta slipped somethin' inta me rum last night." He jumped off the table and threw the broom at Elizabeth, hitting her in the head. "Ow!" "Oh shut it!" Barbossa yelled walking into the room. "Quit yer sniveling and make breakfast woman." Elizabeth huffed and started to make breakfast.

* * *

"Holy mother's son!" Will yelled from the living room. Norrington ran in. "What's going on?" He found Will in the living room crouched in front of a big….thing. Norrington crouched down by Will. "What the hell is this?" he asked in an awed voice. Will shook his head. "I don't know. This note that was left on it," he handed the note to Norrington. "Says it's a telleyvizon." 

"A telleyvizon?" Will nodded. "Yeah, it's even got instructions." He walked over to a rack with a million remotes on it. "It says, we are supposed to find a remote with the letters "T" and "V" on it and push the big red button." "Sounds easy enough," Norrington said joining Will at the rack of a million remotes.

They looked for about five minutes before they found it. "Look!" Norrington called. "I found it." He pulled it off the rack and moved to stand in front of the telleyvizon. "So which button?" "The big red one." Norrington snorted. "Which big red on?" Will checked the note. "I don't know. It just says the big one. Just pick one and push it."

Norrington pushed a red button at the bottom of the remote. "Nothing happened."

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" Tia screamed from her and Elizabeth's room. "The bed is bewitched! It's tryin' ta eat me!!" Norrington and Will looked at each other. "Well, that ain't it," Will said as Norrington pushed the button again. "Let me choose," he said pushing one next to the button Norrington pushed.

Right after, they heard a loud noise coming from the telleyvizon. They covered their ears. "What is that noise?" Norrington yelled. "I don't know," Will yelled back. "Check the note!" Norrington tossed the remote away and pulled the note out. "It says that if a loud sound like this one starts, we turned on the," he leaned closer to the note. "The surround sound!" Will nodded and grabbed the remote and pushed the button again.

The noise shut off and they both heaved sighs of relief. "Let's wait till later to discover the inner workings of the telleyvizon, shall we?" Will suggested as they walked into the kitchen.

* * *

Elizabeth had rummaged in the cupboards and found something called "Cap'n Crunch." "Wow! It says Cap'n! It must be for me!" exclaimed Jack as he grabbed it off the table. "Jack! No!" Tia screamed smacking his hand and putting it back on the table. 

Barbossa picked up the box and examined it. "How do ya make it?" Everyone shrugged. "Let's try it with rum," Jack suggested. He grabbed his rum and poured some cereal in a bowl. He poured rum on top of it and was about to eat with his hands when a spoon hit him in the nose. "Oi! What was that for?" "Use cutlery Jack," Elizabeth chastised. "Fine." He dipped the spoon into the cereal and took a big bite. He chewed it for a second and choked. "How is it Jack?" Elizabeth asked. He swallowed and coughed again. "Oh, just great. Here, why don't you try it?"

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**Haha. Rum and Cap'n Crunch. Best combo ever. The next one will be up soon. Probably in two or three days. If it's any later it's because I'm working on my other stories I'm writing. Sorry for any grammatical and/or spelling errors. I checked it and fixed all the ones I found. **

**Review Please! Hasta la vista baby!**


	3. Hailey Visits

**Ch.3 Hailey Visits**

Disclaimer: I, sadly, do no own PotC even though I wish I did. I do own the ideas and my character Hailey, though.

A/N: Thank you to everyone who has reviewed. You guys freaking rock! Please review this chapter also. Also, I'm sorry if the characters are a little OOC. I am working on that problem.

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After breakfast, everyone went to find something constructive to do. Or destructive. Davy was sitting on the couch looking a magazine called Cosmopolitan when Jack walked in and sat by him. "'Ey fish face. What ya doin'?" Davy ignored him and flipped through the magazine some more.

Jack huffed. "Oh c'mon ya slimy git. Say somthin'." Davy glared at him and said, "Shut it." He stood and clunked into his room. Jack sighed. "Well now what do I do?" He looked around but nothing caught his attention. He started bouncing up and down on the couch. "Wow. This is fun!"

He stood up and started jumping on it. He jumped higher each time. Once, he jumped on the edge of the couch and went crashing into the rack of a million remotes. He sat up. "Well that was fun. Let's do it again!" He started jumping on the couch again and this time, he crashed into the front door just as the doorbell rang. "What the hell is that buzzing noise?"

The person started banging on the door. He stood up and threw open the door. "What the hell do you want?" He paused. "Don't I know you?" The person in the doorway laughed. "Yeah, sort of. It's me, Hailey." Jack gave her a confused look. "Who?" She laughed again. "It was two days ago when I introduced you guys for this show." Jack shook his head and was about to shut the door when Will walked by.

"Hailey!" he said noticing her standing outside. "C'mon in." Hailey stepped in and whistled. "Wow, nice place." Will laughed. "Yeah. If we could figure out how to work it, it'd be even better." "What d'you mean 'work it'?" Will shook his head. "Never mind. So, what are you doing here?" "Oh, well my grandma lives about three blocks away so I asked if I could come live her for awhile."

Will nodded. "Right. So, what do you to do?" Hailey shrugged. "Let's watch TV." Will looked at her. "TV?" Hailey nodded. "Yeah. Y'know, television." Will nodded, suddenly understanding. "Oh, telleyvizon." Hailey laughed. "Yeah." Jack snorted. "Why don't you two get a room already? Yer makin' me sick." Hailey and Will blushed. "Shut it Jack. Go make fun of Elizabeth or shoot the monkey or something," Will said, pulling Hailey into the living room.

They sat on the couch and Will asked, "So how do you work this "TV"?" Hailey looked at him like he was crazy. "You haven't watched TV yet?" Will shook his head. "Norrington and I couldn't figure out which button to push." Hailey laughed. "Oh, well then, give me the remote and I'll show you." Will handed her the remote and Hailey turned on the TV. "Oh my God! What did you push?" "This big one that says power." "Oh…"

Hailey flipped through the channels until she stopped on MTV. The Real World was on. "Look! There's us on the fist show when I introduced you guys." Will watched in amazement as he stumbled on to the stage and screamed. "I didn't do that." "Yeah you did," Hailey giggled. Will blushed. "Maybe. Can we watch something else?" "Sure."

Hailey started flipping through the channels. She stopped on a channel with cartoons playing. It was The Fairly Odd Parents. "I love this show!" Hailey exclaimed. "Who's screaming?" Elizabeth asked as she walked in. "Hailey did," Will said pointing at Hailey. "Hailey? Isn't she the strange girl from the introduction show?"

"Hey!" Hailey piped up. "I'm not strange." Elizabeth snorted. "Sure." She looked at the TV. "Oh, what is this?" "Fairly Odd Parents," Hailey replied with a giggled. Elizabeth squeezed herself in between Will and Hailey. "This is amazing." Hailey gasped. "You guys have never watched cartoons?" Will and Elizabeth shook their heads. "Why not?" Elizabeth gave her a look that said "Don't you realize that we're from a different time period?"

"Because," Will explained. "We're from the past." Hailey nodded. "Oh yeah!" she jumped up. "Hang on a sec. I'm going to get some popcorn and soda."

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In the kitchen, Hailey found Barbossa and Norrington playing Battleship. Well, they weren't exactly playing but they were making an effort. "Awww, you sunk my small plastic thing," Barbossa said. Norrington laughed. He turned Barbossa's board around and looked at his ship's placements. "Um….A3." He turned the board around. "Hit," Barbossa growled.

He glared at Norrington. "I think yer cheatin'." Norrington put on a hurt look. "I would never. I am an honorable former Commodore of the Royal Navy. I have never cheated a day in my life." Hailey laughed. "Right James." She looked over Norrington's shoulder and whispered to Barbossa, "C4." Barbossa grinned. "C4." Norrington glared at him. "Hit." Barbossa barked out a laugh. "That's payback."

Norrington stood and looked down his nose at Hailey. He studied her for a moment. "Who are you?" he asked. "You look familiar." "Aye," Barbossa said, looking at her closely. "Yeah," Hailey said, nodding. "I'm the person who introduced you on the introduction show the other day." Norrington nodded. "I remember now. You're the young women who fainted when Jack came out. "Hailey blushed. "Maybe."

"Who said my name?" Jack said swaying into the room. "Speak of the devil," Norrington muttered. "What're ya'll doin' in here?" "Well, Barbossa and James were playing Battleship and I was getting snacks for me and Will." She went to the fridge and pulled out two Pepsi's. She set them on the counter and went digging in the cupboards for popcorn.

She found a bag and stuck it in the microwave. "What's that strange contraption?" Norrington asked. "A microwave." Jack looked confused. "Microwave? What's it do?" Hailey thought for a second. "It sends out low radiation wave things and it, like, heats up the food." Barbossa, Norrington and Jack all looked at her with dumb stares. Hailey sighed.

"It's kind of like magic, but not. I don't know how to explain it. Ask me later." She grabbed the popcorn out of the microwave as it beeped and poured it in a bowl. She grabbed the bowl and Pepsis and went into the living room.

Jack smiled in a crazy fashion. "Do ya lads want to heat stuff up?" Norrington and Barbossa nodded and searched the kitchen for stuff to microwave.

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Hey people. I'm so sorry I haven't updated in awhile. My friend comandeered my notebook and we've decided to write it together and he's had it for awhile now. And everytime I'm around him my mind gets a little foggy and...let's just say that getting my notebook back from him is ususally the last thing on my mind. Hehe. Please review. 


	4. Explosion!

**Ch.4 Explosions **

Disclaimer: I don not own PotC but if I did things would be A LOT different. I do own my original character Hailey and almost all of the ideas.

A/N: My friend and I are writing this together now so it might get a lot crazier. He's kind of crazy… but it will still be funny….

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Hailey sat next to Will and Elizabeth laughing at the TV. Will chuckled with her and Elizabeth glared sternly at the show. "That kind of humor really isn't funny." "What are you talking about?" Hailey asked wiping tears from her eyes. "That's funny!" Elizabeth huffed and crossed her arms across her chest. 

"You know," Elizabeth pointed out snottily. "It's not proper conduct for a lady to act in such a manner in front of a man." Hailey stopped. "Really? I've acted like this in front of everyone. I never knew…" She was cut off by a loud BOOM! "What in the hell?" They jumped off the couch and ran into the kitchen.

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When they entered, they found Jack, Norrington, and Barbossa on the ground covered in exploded food. Hailey ran to Jack. "Oh my gosh! Are you guys okay?" Jack laughed. "We're fine but I'm not so sure 'bout that microwave thing." Hailey laughed. 

She went over to it and looked on the inside. Food covered every inch of it. Hailey gagged and backed away. "My God! That's horrible." Will looked and sniffed. "It's not that bad. I've seen worse." "Then you clean it out," Hailey said throwing a rag at him and filling a bucket with water.

She set Will to work on the microwave and led the other three to the showers. "Okay," she said turning them on and adjusting the temperature. "Have either of you ever taken a shower?" The men looked at her and shook their heads. "Of course not. You're pirates that live on a boat and bather whenever you feel like it," she mumbled to herself.

"I thought women liked that?" Jack slurred with a flirty smile. Hailey shook her head. "Not in this century." Jack frowned. "Alrighty then," Hailey said. "Undress and get in. Wash yourselves and then call me when you're done." Jack smirked. "What? You're not going to help me?"

Hailey gaped at him. "Uh…n-no." She ran out of the bathroom. Jack frowned again. "Why do they always run away?"

* * *

Will finished cleaning the microwave and went back into the living room. He found Elizabeth still glued to the TV. "Elizabeth, are you alright?" She turned to look at him. "I…am…fine," she said in a monotone voice. Suddenly, her eyes rolled into her head and she passed out. 

Will stood there, staring open-mouthed at her. Just then, Hailey walked in. She looked from Elizabeth to Will and asked, "What happened?" Will shrugged. "I came in here and asked if she was okay and she just passed out."

Hailey looked back at Elizabeth. "Oh," she said. She and Will stood and stared at the motionless body for about a minute before Hailey suddenly said, "Maybe we should help her." "Good idea," Will replied.

Hailey bent down and leaned over Elizabeth while Will looked on anxiously. Although trying desperately to look in control, Hailey really had no clue what she was doing; she was extremely reluctant to even _think_ about mouth-to-mouth. So she decided to try a few other options first.

"Um...Elizabeth?" she said nervously. "Elizabeth? …Lizzie…?" Suddenly, Elizabeth's hand shot out and latched it self around Hailey's throat. Her eyes shot open as Hailey gagged, and an insane smile played across her lips. She sat up slowly, steadily tightening her grip, until she quite abruptly let go, causing Hailey, who was now in a kneeling position, to slump sideways onto the floor.

Elizabeth shook her head, looked around trying to look completely bewildered, then said, (rather cheesily) "Oh my gosh! What on earth am I doing here?" Will just looked at her incredulously, then turned away and began to tend to Hailey. "Oh my gosh, what happened?" Will ignored her, keeping his back turned as he tried to revive Hailey. "_Will?!" _she said slightly louder, now thoroughly irritated.

He did not reply. "AUGH!" Elizabeth stood, stomped once, then stormed out of the room, fists clenched, glaring death at everything and everyone.

* * *

Meanwhile, Will was getting desperate; Hailey didn't seem to be breathing. So, realizing it was his only option, he did the only thing any good sailor could do: began to administer mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. He bent down close to Hailey' pale face, hesitated a moment, then placed his lips on hers. 

Her eyes snapped open just as he started exhaling. Extremely startled, she did the only thing that a girl being given mouth-to-mouth by William Turner could do: turned immediately red, then began coughing violently. Will backed off a bit too late as Hailey suddenly sat up, thus smashing her head against his quite hard.

They both fell backwards on their buttes, Will holding his head in pain, Hailey clutching her chest as she gulped in huge lung-fulls of air and coughed simultaneously. Eventually, Hailey caught her breath and stared at Will, blushing furiously, for about a minute before they both broke out laughing.

After about two more minutes the laughter subsided enough to talk. "Wow…um…awkward moment," Hailey said. "Yeah…" Will replied, wincing slightly as he said it. "Oh, is your head okay?" Hailey asked, walking over to the still-sitting Will and tenderly examining his forehead. "Yeah, it'll be fine," he replied, slowly standing up. "Uh, sorry about that whole…thing…you know, the…" he stuttered. "Oh, no, it's okay…" Hailey replied, blushing again. "It's just that you were…" "Will," she cut him off, "It's okay, really."

He still didn't look too sure. "Alright," he said, "but I'll make it up to you anyway. Um…you do have restaurants here, right?" Hailey laughed. "Of course. Why?" "Well…" he replied unsteadily, "I was hoping you might want to… go out tonight…?"

Hailey's heart practically stopped as her jaw went slack in disbelief. "Oh…! Um…I …well, I mean…yeah, sure…!" Will heaved an almost audible sigh relief. "Alright. Um…when do you want to leave?" he asked. "As soon as you're done getting ready, I guess…" Hailey replied. "Well, I'll go do that then." Will said, flashing her a brief smile before he walked off toward his room.

After he was gone, Hailey plopped heavily onto the couch. Still kind of out of breath, she realized…she was going to dinner with Will Turner!

* * *

Barbossa, Norrington, and jack had all finished their showers, and now they all sat on the living room floor. Barbossa and Jack had found a "Pirates of the Caribbean 2: Dead Man's Chest" Special Edition Chess Set, and were commencing to pick sides before they sat up the board. 

"I'm the Black Pearl!" Jack exclaimed, reaching for the piece modeled after the precious ship. His hand, however, was forcefully knocked aside by Barbossa. "No, Jack;" the grizzled pirate said. "I think _I'll _be the Pearl. She is, after all, _my _ship." Jack was shocked and slightly aggravated at this statement, but quickly regained his composure. "_Your_ ship?" he said incredulously. "The Pearl is _my _ship, Barbossa, and thus I have rights to her, even in the case of something as petty as a board game."

Barbossa grinned humorlessly, his hand caressing his sword hilt. "Now, Jack. Do we really want to be playin' this game again?" Jack looked confused. "I thought that was the point of taking it out of the box?" "You know what I mean, Jack. Are we to be locked in battle again, fighting until the end of eternity over who will be captain of my ship?"

"There's three problems with that, mate; **one,** she's not your ship. **Two,** we're no longer undead, and thus cannot fight until the end of eternity, and **three**…" Here he darted his hand into the box and pulled out a piece resembling himself and pointed at it. "The King's got my name on it." He gave Barbossa a mocking sympathetic smile. "Sorry, mate."

Barbossa shook with fury, trying desperately to control himself, glowering dangerously at Jack. He finally let out an enraged yell, drew his sword, and promptly stabbed the couch. "You win, Jack. But mark my words, one day I'll get you, and your little dog too!" he said as he reached resignedly for the rook modeled after the Flying Dutchman.

Jack thought for a brief moment on the fact that he didn't have a dog, but to decided to leave the subject alone. Norrington muttered something about how there were no ships of the Royal Navy in the set, then looked on quietly in disgust as the two pirates commenced playing.

* * *

Hailey and Will walked though the living room towards the door just as Jack and Barbossa were finishing their third game. (Norrington had long ago tired of watching and had contented himself with watching Saturday Night Live.) Jack looked at the oddly for a second, then sprang to his feet and confronted. 

"So," he said mischievously. "You finally found yourself a women of substance." Will almost hit him. "Shut up, Jack." The Captain threw his hands up defensively, then turned to walk away, only to stop and wrinkle his as he passed Hailey.

He turned to her and brought his face dangerously close to her chest, then sniffed deeply. Obviously bewildered, he stepped back and looked at her curiously. "You smell funny," he stated quite matter-of-factly. Will was appalled, but Hailey began to laugh. "It's perfume Jack; women wear it to smell good."

"Oh," he replied, apparently a bit confused. "I still say it smells funny," he said, striding back over to sit adjacent to Barbossa. Still laughing, Hailey followed will out the door.

"Another game, Jack?" Barbossa asked. "No," Captain Sparrow replied. "I could do with some alcohol, though.," he added, turning to walk towards the kitchen. "Ya read my mind, lad!" Barbossa said, leaping up to follow.

When they reached the kitchen, Jack went straight for the cupboard beneath the sink. "My private stash, mate," he said proudly to Barbossa, throwing the doors wide… it was empty. Jack and Barbossa stood there dumbstruck for a moment before Jack finally said what they were both thinking: "Where's the rum gone?"

* * *

Yay! Chapter 4 is up! I'm proud of myself! pats self on the back Well there ya have it! Jack doesn't like perfume and Will and Hailey are going out on a date. But where has Jack's rum gone?! I could be a nice authoress and tell you right now...but I'm not nice and I don't feel like it so you have to wait till the next chapter! Mwahahahahahahaha! The next chapter probably won't be up for awhile because I've got to write it and I've got to finish my research paper and beat my friend in this contest we're having in English. I'm gonna get the damn prize!!!! Please review! 


	5. The Date and Unexpected Confrontations

Ch.5 the Date and Unexpected Confrontations

Disclaimer: I do not own PotC, sadly.

I finally got this posted. I'm sorry if I kept you waiting but my friend had my notebook and then I went on a trip and now I'm doing this babysitting job and haven't had time. Thank you to everyone who's reviewed the last chapters. You're effing wonderful.

* * *

Three doors down the hall, Tia Dalma was trying in vain to concentrate on her book, "Voodoo of the East Indies: A User's Guide". Elizabeth sat on the bed on the opposite side of the room drinking rum she had stolen from Jack's private stash. She took another big gulp and started to cry. "No, please! No more cryin'," Tia yelled. "Why is he going out with _her_?" Elizabeth complained, waving her bottle of rum around. "We are supposed to be engaged! But instead…" She took another drink. "He's off running around with that…that…_tramp_ doing who knows what!"

Tia groaned and covered her head with her pillow. "Please, no more! Make her shut up!" She yelled into the pillow. She stopped yelling when she heard a loud clunking sound. She removed the pillow and looked over at Elizabeth. Tia began to laugh as she saw Davy Jones standing over Elizabeth with her rum bottle in hand. He glared down at Elizabeth and then realized Tia was staring at her and laughing.

He glared at her. "I could hear her from my room and you weren't doing anything to stop her. So, I came in her to yell at her," he said. "And she passed out when she saw me." Tia laughed harder at his explanation. Davy's tentacles took on a reddish tint. Tia stopped suddenly. "Oh my gosh. Is you blushin' Davy Jones?" she said, standing up to move closer and examine his face. He shook his head, his tentacles and face turning redder. "N-no…I don't blush. And even if I did, I have no reason to," he said, turning on his heel and stomping out of the room.

Tia watched him stomp out with a smile. "Well well, squids can blush." She laughed and covered Elizabeth with her blankets. She shut the door, laid down on her bed and went back to reading her book.

* * *

Will and Hailey walked down the street toward Topeka's main street. "What kind of food do you like?" Will asked looking around. "Um…well, I kind of like Chinese." Will gave her a disgusted look. "Ugh…that stuff? Have you seen those short little men with the squinty eyes cook that stuff? They cook it on the ground. It's positively disgusting…" He trailed off when Hailey started laughing. "What is so funny?"

"They can't cook like that anymore Will," Hailey explained between laughs. "There are health codes and stuff…I don't know much about it. I mean, I'm not a chef or anything." Will raised an eyebrow. "So, it's all sanitary then?" "Yes," Hailey said. "It has to be sanitary or their restaurant will be shut down." Will nodded but still looked suspicious as they entered the restaurant.

They were seated, handed menus, and asked what they wanted to drink. "What you like to drink?" asked the waitress. "I'll have a Dr.Pepper," said Hailey. The waitress scribbled down Hailey's order, then turned to Will, pen poised expectantly over her notepad. "Rum, please," said Will, not even bothering to look up to see the incredulous look on the waitress's face. "Um, Will?" Hailey said, nudging Will in the side with her elbow, thus grabbing his attention. "They don't serve alcohol here." Shocked and very embarrassed, Will managed to stutter out his second order. "Oh…uh…I'll…I'll have the same," he said, pointing at Hailey.

Nodding in satisfaction, the waitress jolted down a ditto mark. "Ok, that all you want?" she inquired politely. Both the customers nodded. "Ok, I be back to take order in a little." She then strolled off, leaving Hailey and Will to their own devices.

"God, I feel stupid," Will said, burying his face in his menu. Hailey laughed. "It's okay," she said, patting him on the back. "At least you didn't accidentally order Won-ton at a Mexican restaurant." Will covered his mouth and snorted slightly as he held back a sudden burst of laughter. "Who did that?" he asked. Hailey blushed and looked down at her napkin. "Me…" she replied bashfully. "Oh…" Will said, now feeling like a complete jerk.

"Sorry, I didn't mean…" "No, that's okay," Hailey replied, beginning to giggle. "Now that I think about it, it was pretty funny." Will looked extremely relieved, and looked up eagerly as the waitress approached, paper and pen at the ready. "Ok, you know what you want?"

* * *

Jack stared unblinking at the TV, ex-Commodore Norrington beside him on the couch. They had picked a random, case-less video cassette and put it in the VCR; it had turned out to be "The Little Mermaid". Jack, slowly slipping into a headache-plagued stupor from lack of alcohol, pointed at the screen and slurred to Norrington; "I saw one of those once," he said, indicating one of the fish-tailed people.

Norrington looked at him for a minute before spitting, "No you haven't." Still staring at the television, Jack replied, "I have too; had the funny tail thingy and all. Said his name was Philip…" Here he trailed off, apparently following his train of thought right out of the station.

Norrington huffed in disbelief. "You have not seen a mer-person any more that you've seen Elizabeth naked." The latter two words of this sentence snapped Jack out of his state of semi-consciousness; "What? Where? Naked…? Oh…" Norrington smirked and turned his attention back to the TV.

"You probably had too much to drink," he said mockingly. This got Jack's attention. "Are you calling me a liar?" he said defensively. "No," Norrington replied sarcastically. "Just a hallucinating drunk." Jack, now very offended, poked Norrington aggressively in the chest. "Them's fightin' words, mate!" he said. "Fine," said Norrington as he stood up and balled his fists; he finally had the conflict he'd been looking for all day.

"Let's go." Jack stood up immediately, only to stagger backwards with one hand to his forehead. The former "honorable" commodore seized the opportunity and landed a solid punch to Jack's face. The pirate promptly fell over, completely knocked out. Norrington rolled his eyes, lowered his fists, and sighed, walking over to where Jack lay on the carpet. With a grunt and a heave, he threw the unconscious pirate over his shoulder and carried him to his room.

Barbossa opened his door just as Norrington walked by, carrying his load. The ex-Commodore halted for a moment to see the grizzled Captain standing frozen in the doorway wearing a pair of green silk boxers with the word "HOTTIE" written in blue letters all over them. An awkward silence followed, finally broken by Norrington. "I won' ask if you won't," he said. "Agreed," replied Barbossa. Norrington then continued down the hall with Jack slung over his should like a sack of potatoes, and Barbossa quickly retreated back into his room, shutting the door behind him.

* * *

After they finished at the restaurant, Hailey decided to take Will out for ice cream. "Ice cream?" Will asked as they entered the ice cream parlor. "What's it made out of?" Hailey thought about it for a moment as she searched for her favorite flavor. "Umm… sugar, milk, umm….artificial flavor and chocolate," she answered. Will raised an eyebrow. "Artificial? What do you mean "artificial"?" Hailey shrugged. "I don't know buy they put it in practically everything."

Will shuddered. Now he wasn't sure he wanted to eat any of this "artificial" stuff. "You now, Hailey, I don't have much of an appetite anymore. Why don't we…" Hailey cut him off. "You're eating the ice cream whether you like it or not." Will scoffed. "Oh yeah. Who's going to make me?" Hailey laughed and pointed out the flavor she wanted to the person behind the counter. "If you don't, I'll lock you in a room with Elizabeth and Jack."

Will shivered and backed down. "Okay, I'll eat the "artificial" ice cream." Hailey laughed. "Oh, Will, the ice cream isn't artificial, it's the stuff it's made of that's artificial. So what flavor do you want?"

* * *

Elizabeth woke with a huge hangover and a monkey on her chest. She looked at the monkey for awhile until the light started to hurt her eyes. "Why are lights so bright?" she said groggily. "The lights aren't on," Tia replied from her bed. "and you just woke me up with your screaming." The monkey chattered and Elizabeth cringed. "Quiet. You're making your monkey noises too loud. Could you quiet down just a bit?" Elizabeth said to the monkey who screamed and jumped over to Tia.

Elizabeth whimpered and covered her ears with her hands. Tia laughed and patted the monkey's head. She got up and walked over to Elizabeth's bed. "Is this the first time you've drank?" Elizabeth nodded. "Well no wonder yer over here moanin' and cryin'! Come," she said, pulling Elizabeth out of bed. "Let's go inta he kitchen and I'll fix yer had."

Tia led her into the kitchen and sat her down at the table. Tia started digging in cupboards for tea. She found some and mad a cup for Elizabeth. "Here ya go. Drink up." Elizabeth thanked and took a big gulp. She choked and spit it out. "What kind of tea is this?" "Don't ask," Tia said with a smirk. Elizabeth stared at Tia in horror but drank the horrible tea anyway.

"Alright, I'm gonna make ya some soup that'll get rid of yer headache," Tia said as she looked around the kitchen for ingredients. "Where is the squid? I need squid," she mumbled to herself. Elizabeth choked on her tea again. "Squid?! How will squid get rid of my headache?" "Shut it! Ya want to get rid of it right?" Elizabeth nodded. "Then don't worry 'bout what goes into it," Tia snapped and went back to searching for ingredients. "Oh great, I'm going to die from squid poisoning." Elizabeth muttered and took another gulp of her tea.

* * *

So there you have it. Chapter Five. Can't you just picture Barbossa in those boxers? Thank you again to everyone who has reviewed and a big thank you to my co writer, Dustin, even though he's most likely never gonna read this. Please review with criticism, praise or flames which will, in return, burn your house down. 


	6. The First Kiss and Discovering Music

**Chapter Title:** The First Kiss and Discovering Music

**Author:** FlamingRosesInDarkness

**Disclaimer:** Obviously, I don't own this or it would be a show already! I also don't own any of the songs/artists mentioned in this chapter.

**Warning:** There is a little slash hinted (if you squint) in this one. I'm sorry if it offends.

**A/N:** I'm finally posting the next chapter! Yay!! coughs I realize I haven't posted in awhile and that's because I've been very lethargic lately and I've been playing with puppies. But I've already started the next chapter so it should be up faster than this one was. And to apologize, everyone gets cookies!! hands out cookies to faithful readers Any way, please review with comments/questions/criticisms/random marriage proposals or anything else.

* * *

"Elizabeth!" Jack yelled, sitting up. Norrington laughed. "No, wrong person I'm afraid. But I'm willing to go get her if you'd like." Jack shook his head. He moved to get up out of bed but went into convulsions as pain shot through his head and fell to the floor. Norrington shook his head and lifted the convulsing pirate into bed.

"You need to stay in bed, Jack," Norrington said, walking to the door. Jack got comfortable under the covers and asked, "Why're you so concerned?" Norrington stopped dead in his tracks. "N-no reason. It's a natural response when someone is hurt.," he stammered, not looking at Jack. Jack snorted in disbelief. "Sure, mate. Keep tellin' yerself that." Norrington blushed lightly and stomped out. Jack laughed and closed his eyes to try and sleep.

* * *

Will and Hailey got home from their date and found Elizabeth passed out in the kitchen. Hailey raised an eyebrow and poked Elizabeth. "Elizabeth! Wakey wakey, eggs and bacy!" she said in a singsong voice. Elizabeth sat up from her hunched position and screamed, "Shoot the monkey! It stole my cookies!" She stopped her screaming and looked around.

Will and Hailey started laughing. Elizabeth stared at them dumbly before she realized they were laughing at her. She brushed hair out of her yes and said, "_What _is so funny?" Will stopped laughing and shook his head. "Nothing Elizabeth," he said, elbowing Hailey to get her to stop laughing. Hailey stopped and nodded.

Elizabeth groaned and clutched her head in pain as the monkey came swinging into the room screaming. He landed on Hailey's shoulder and cocked his head quizzically at Elizabeth. Hailey put a finger to her lips and said, "Quiet, Jack. You hurt Elizabeth." Jack grunted apologetically. "C'mon Elizabeth," Will said, lifting her out of the chair. "Let's get you to bed." He started towards her room. "I'll be right back, Hailey."

Elizabeth scowled and Hailey nodded. Will carried Elizabeth into her room. Hailey sat at the table and occupied herself by playing patty cake with Jack. Will walked back into the room and laughed at the scene. Hailey jumped and promptly fell out of her chair, landing at Will's feet. "You're very clumsy," Will said, picking Hailey up and holding her by the waist to make sure she didn't fall again.

Hailey blushed and looked up at Will. Their eyes met and they both turned away, blushing. They stood there, like that, a couple minutes more. Finally, Hailey broke the awkward silence by saying, "I should probably go. I told my grandma I'd be home hours ago. She must be freaking out by now." Will nodded and walked her to the door.

* * *

They stood at the door, both trying to gather the courage to speak. Eventually, Barbossa, who'd been standing around the corner, got tired of this and said, "Hurry up and kiss 'er already." Will and Hailey blushed again. Will leaned down to kiss her and bumped his forehead on hers. His hand flew up to his forehead. "Ow…"

They looked at each other and started laughing. "I think it's going to turn into a bruise," Hailey whined. She looked at a clock hanging next to the door. "Wow… it's late. I should go." She leaned up and kissed Will on the lips lightly. They stood there, eyes wide, stunned. Then Hailey remembered she needed to leave, reluctantly pulled away from Will, and said she'd come by the next day before walking out the door.

Will stood there, momentarily shocked, staring at the front door. Barbossa walked up and clapped Will on the shoulder. "Good job, lad. Thought you'd messed it up for a moment, but ya fixed yer problem in the end." He laughed loudly and went to his room. Will shook his head and followed suit. He lay down in bed, without changing, and stared up at the ceiling. He thought of the kiss and broke into a smile. He eventually fell asleep with the smile still on his face.

* * *

Jack walked into the confession booth, turned on the camera and sat down. He sighed and looked around, making sure no one was around. He looked at the camera and said, "Why doesn't she like _me_?" He shook his head. "I mean, she had _my_ face on her shirt. Why isn't she tryin' to get my attention?" Jack wiped a couple tears from his eyes. "I always thought I was more popular with the ladies," he said in a whiney tone. He suddenly stood up and smirked in his characteristic way as an idea formed in his mind. "Guess I'll just have to prove it won't I? IN two days, she'll have forgotten about dear William and moved on to bigger and better things," he said with a wink to the camera and walked out.

* * *

Norrington, who had, after his confrontation with Jack, went into his room and hit himself on the head repeatedly with a book until he passed out, went into the living room when woke to discover another wondrous electronic device, the stereo. Taped to it, was a not with instructions, same as the TV and there was a huge rack of CD's next to it.

He took off the note and quickly read it. "Seems simple enough," he said to himself as he looked at the CD rack. "Hmmm….Justin Timberlake, O-Zone, Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera…" He pulled out the newest Justin Timberlake album, FutureSexLoveSounds, and inserted into the slot the note indicated. Immediately, the song, Sexyback, began to play.

Norrington listened to it for a moment and started to bob his head along with the beat. "It's kind of catchy…" he said, looking around to make sure no one was around. He started to move a little more, flailing his arms about and kicking his legs out, making him resemble and epileptic chicken. He danced for a little while longer and stopped when he heard clapping.

"Well done, mate," Jack said, moving closer, still clapping. Norrington flushed a bright red and hastily shut off the stereo. "What do you want Sparrow?" Norrington asked trying to regain a little bit of dignity. Jack laughed and held up his hands defensively. "I'm sorry if I've offended you, Mr. Former Commodore, but I require your assistance in a very important life or death situation," he said examining the CD rack.

Norrington sniffed. "Why do you need my help?" Jack stopped and looked at Norrington. "I'm going to steal Hailey from Will." Norrington gaped at him in disbelief. "You're _what_?" "You heard me. I'm going to get Will's little bonnie lass to fall for me," he explained while examining his nails.

"Are you drunk?" Norrington asked with a raised eyebrow. Jack feigned offense. "Absolutely not. Actually, I haven't had a drink since yesterday so I am in an extreme amount of excruciatin' pain." Norrington was still a little skeptical but believed him somewhat. He noticed that Jack's slur had gone down and he wasn't staggering as much. "Fine," Norrington mumbled. "What's your plan then?"

* * *

"ARGH!!" Davy yelled stomping into Tia and Elizabeth's room. Davy had woken u that morning to find that a couple of tentacles were missing. Tia sat up from her bed and asked angrily, "What do ya want? I was sleepin'." Davy glared and said, "You know why I'm here. What did you do with them?" Tia looked confused for a moment. Then realization dawned on her.

She laughed. "I needed to make something to shut her up,: she explained, pointing to the still sleeping Elizabeth. "So I…._borrowed_ a couple." Davy glared even more than before. "Borrowed!? Ya cut off four! That isn't _borrowing_!" Tia just yawned and said, "Ya look better without'em anyway." She yawned again and laid back down.

Davy was left standing there glaring at Tia's sleeping form while a reddish tint crawled up his face once again. "Damn witch," he muttered after few moments and stomped out of the room.

* * *

Barbossa sat in the kitchen reading a newspaper that had been sitting on the porch. He was currently reading the comic section, trying to figure out the punch line to one of the comics and eating a bowl of cereal, with milk. Frustrated, he threw the paper on the table. He grumbled about tracking down whoever wrote the comic strip and shooting them while taking a bite of cereal.

Norrington walked in and paused at the door. He shook his head and continued to the refrigerator. He opened it and searched for something to eat, silently. Barbossa looked up from his cereal bowl and opened his mouth to say something.

"Don't." Norrington cut him off. Barbossa closed his mouth. We are _not_ going to talk about it," Norrington said, glaring at Barbossa over his shoulder. The grizzled pirate nodded and went back to eating his cereal. Norrington nodded, pulled an apple out of the fridge and left the kitchen just as silently as he'd entered.

* * *

So, I finally got it posted. I feel kind of proud of myself. pats self lightly on shoulder I think the part with Will and Hailey got kind of mushy. Don't you? And the part with Norrington and Jack didn't turn out the way I expected. (It's not like I was expecting anything. O.o) Please review with comments/praises/criticisms/random marriage proposals or anything else. Flames will be used to burn you alive. So please, don't send them.


	7. Telephones and Pizza

**Chapter Title: **Telephones and Pizza

**Author: **FlamingRosesInDarkness

**Disclaimer: **I don't own PotC, Cher or My Chemical Romance. Oh...and Dominoes.

**Warning: **There might be hints of slash. Depends on how it all turns out.

**A/N: **Beware, this was written at like three in the morning and I was pissed because my CD wouldn't work and I had to rewrite it. I'm sorry if it's crappy. I will be adding two more characters. They should appear in the next chapter. Please review with comments/praises/criticisms or whatever else you want to.

**A/N2:** I don't know the real names of the Real World producers so I made up one. Nathaniel Wright (if he's not already a real person) is my character. And Lexi (Alexis) is property of the wonderful DxS Phreak who is letting me borrow her for this fic. Thank you so much. Oh, and Nate is also my own character.

* * *

Hailey knocked on the door as Norrington was walking by, headed toward the living room. He sighed and opened the door. Hailey grinned. "Hey James. What's up?" Norrington, slightly confused, looked up. "The ceiling?" he asked dumbly. Hailey laughed. "Oh, I know that. What I meant was; how are you?" 

Norrington moved out of the way and answered, "I'm fine. How are you?" She shrugged. "I'm okay, I guess. Where's Will?" Norrington shrugged in return. "Haven't seen him all morning. He's probably still asleep." Hailey nodded. "Well, I don't want to wake him. So, can I hang out with you till he wakes up?" Norrington studied her closely before replying with a dry, "Fine," and continuing into the living room.

Hailey closed the door and followed. Norrington sat on the couch and Hailey examined the stereo and CD rack. "Cool," she said, pulling a CD off the rack. It was a _My Chemical Romance _album. She popped it into the stereo and _Famous Last Words _poured out of the speakers. Hailey started singing along and Norrington covered his ears and groaned.

He had wanted to sit down, in peace and quiet, and think about Jack's plan. But now his eardrums were being assaulted by "music" that sounded like screeching cats clawing at a chalk board. He stood and stomped over to the stereo. Hailey looked at him and kept singing. Norrington growled and violently punched the stop button.

Hailey's jaw dropped. "What was that for? What did the stereo ever do to you?" Norrington ignored her and asked, "How can you listen to such trash?" "It is not trash!" Hailey countered. "It's music." Norrington restrained himself from strangling her and spat out, "It sounds like cats screeching in pain while clawing at a chalk board." Hailey glared at him.

"Does not." She ripped a CD from the rack and put it in the stereo. "This is trash to me," she said, pushing play. Cher's voice floated from the speakers and Norrington relaxed a little. "Now this," he said, pointing to the stereo. "Is good music." Hailey stifled a laugh. "You like this?" Norrington nodded. "What's wrong with that?" he asked, confused as to why she was holding back laughter.

Hailey threw up her hands defensively. "Nothing," she said with a laugh. "I'm gonna go find the monkey." She ran from the room laughing. Norrington watched her go with a raised eyebrow. "Weird girl," he mumbled to himself and started to dance.

* * *

"Why're you so happy?" Jack asked after stumbling into the room and seeing Will's expression. Will propped himself up on his elbow's and said, "We kissed." Jack looked around. "Who?" "Me and Hailey," Will replied with a smile. Jack looked at him. He stepped closer and bent down to look him in the eyes. "Ya 'ave kissed a girl before right? Ya are a eunuch, aren't ya?" 

Will scowled. "Of course I have and if you make one more eunuch comment, I'll make _you_ a eunuch." Jack straightened and, ignoring the threat, asked, "Then what's makes this one so special?" Will thought about it for a moment. "It's special because it was with her." Jack frowned. He sat on his bed and asked, "What's so special 'bout 'er?"

Will shrugged. "I don't know." Jack, extremely confused, played with the braids of his goatee. "That's interesting." He laid back on his bed. "Y'know," he said, watching Will out of the corner of his eye and waving his hand around. "She's here. In the house somewheres. Swear I saw 'er." Will jumped up, straightened his clothes, and rushed out of the room. Jack chuckled. "That's very interesting."

* * *

Will found Hailey in the kitchen playing with the monkey. He paused and coughed to announce his presence. Hailey looked up and grinned. Jack, mad that Hailey's attention was diverted from him, screeched and launched himself at Will. Will quickly dodged the flying monkey and Hailey called out, "Goodbye, Jack, my wonderful monkey friend." Hailey and Will laughed. They stopped laughing and lapsed into a semi-awkward silence. Will decided, since he was the "man", he'd break the silence by clearing his throat and asking, "What do you plan on doing today?" 

Hailey shrugged. "I don't know. I decided to come over and hang out cause I was bored and grandma wanted me to rub her feet." She shuddered. Will nodded. He started to say something but was cut off by a strange ringing noise. "What the hell is that?" Hailey looked at him like he was crazy, momentarily forgetting he was from the past.

"It's the telephone," she said, standing and walking to the phone hanging on the wall next to the fridge. She picked up the receiver and said, "Hello, Real World house." She paused as the other person spoke and Will gawked at her. "This is who?" she asked into the phone and Will's jaw dropped when he heard a voice reply, "Nathaniel Wright, one of the producers of the show. Is this Hailey?" "Um...yes."

Nathaniel started explaining something to her and Will watched as a big smile stretched across her face the more she listened. "Oh my God! That's awesome! Thank you so much. I'll call them right now. Bye." She hung up the phone and did a strange dance. "What are you doing?" Hailey stopped and looked at him.

"Oh...that. It's my happy dance." Will laughed. "Happy dance?" Hailey nodded. "Why are you so happy?" he asked. "Oh! Well, that was a producer of the show and he said that since I've been here practically constantly, I can have a couple of friends fly down to spend a week here and be on the show," she said, grabbing the phone and dialing a number.

She waited for the person to answer and screamed. "Lexi!" Lexi screamed back and Hailey asked, "What are you doing this next week?" She paused. "Because you're gonna come down here to be on the Real World and hang out with me!" Hailey held the phone away from her ear as a loud scream erupted from the phone and Will grimaced. He wasn't sure he liked the idea of a screaming girl running around the house. Jack was hard enough to deal with. He didn't need the added stress.

"Alright, pack and be at the airport at 8:15. Tickets'll be waiting for you. See ya." She hung up and smiled at Will. He smiled back ad walked over to her. "Who was that?" he asked, examining the phone. "My friend Alexis. My best friend ever. She's awesome." She laughed. "And she's like in love with Jack." Will frowned. "Why?" She shrugged and picked up the phone again, dialed and waited for an answer.

"Nate? Start packing. I don't care if you were sleeping. Cause you're coming to Topeka. Yes, you have to. Call Lexi. She'll tell you the rest." She hung up and grinned again. "Nate?" Will said leaning on the fridge. "He's my other best friend. Not jealous are you?" Will blushed lightly. "Of course not." "Good. Let's go watch TV."

* * *

Davy sat in his room in front of a mirror, staring at the gap where tentacle were missing. "Damn that crazy witch woman," he muttered to himself, trying to think of a way to make it less noticeable. He sat there, staring and thinking, for over an hour before sighing wearily and stomping to the living room to watch TV. 

He entered the living room and threw himself into a chair. Hailey, who was sitting with Will on the couch, smiled at Davy and said hi. He grunted in response and looked at the TV. Minutes later, Jack came staggering into the room. He looked at Davy and gave him a gold-filled grin.

"Hey, scungili, what happened to yer tentacle beard thing? Looks like a couple are missin'." Davy glowered at him and stood. He grabbed Jack around the throat with his claw hand and squeezed tightly. Jack had a frightened look on his face as Davy leaned down and said, "What did you say?" Jack yelped as Davy squeezed tighter.

"I said I like yer new look. Very flatterin'." Davy smirked. "I thought so." He threw Jack to the floor and stomped back to his room. Jack rubbed his neck. Will and Hailey looked at him and laughed. Jack glared at them. "What's so funny?" They shook their heads and laughed. He sat down on the couch next to Hailey and stared at the TV until they stopped laughing. Hailey took a deep breath and said, "Sorry, Jack. That was really funny though." He looked at her and grinned. "S'okay, love," he said resting a hand on her knee.

Will glared and slapped his hand away. "Don't touch her, Jack." Jack held his hands up. "Sorry, sorry. Didn't mean to impede on yer territory, mate." He leaned close to Hailey and whispered, "D'you know 'e's a eunuch?" Will glared even more. He stood and pulled his father's knife out of his pocket. "Remember what I told you, Jack?" "I think that was a little harsh, Will," Hailey said as she watched Jack run from the room.

* * *

Hours later, Norrington walked into his room and found Jack rifling through his stuff. "What are you doing?" Norrington asked, folding his arms across his chest. Jack didn't stop while he answered, "Lookin' fer rum." Norrington sneered. "I don't have any. Get out." Jack stopped and looked at him. "I need ya to fight me." Norrington shook his head. "No." 

Jack walked over to him. "C'mon, mate. Ya said you'd help me get Will's girl." "No, I said I 'd think about it." Jack nodded. "Ya thought about it right?" Norrington nodded. "And I'm not going to help. I don't see anything in it for me," he said haughtily. Jack's face suddenly grew serious. "How about I promise ta not bother ya the entire time we're rum-free hell." Norrington considered it. "The entire time?" he asked with a raised eyebrow. Jack moved closer. "The entire time." Their faces were mere inches apart. "And I'll get ya yer own weird music thing." Norrington pushed him away. "What were you saying about a fight?" Jack grinned.

* * *

Hailey poked Will and said, "I'm hungry." He looked at her. "So?" "Get me something to eat." Will laughed at her. "It's not funny," she yelled. Will stifled his laughter and asked, "What do you want?" Hailey thought about it. "Pizza." Will gave her a puzzled look. "What's pizza?" 

Hailey gasped. "You poor uneducated thing!" She got up of the couch and pulled him into the kitchen. He sat at the table while she called Dominoes. "Hello. I'd like two large pepperoni and olive pizzas. Okay. Bye." She hung up and sat across from Will. "It'll be here in thirty minutes." They started to talk about a show they'd watched.

Finally, the doorbell rang. Hailey rushed to the door and threw it open. "Beckett?" Standing on the front porch was none other than Lord Cutler Beckett in a Dominoes uniform which clashed horribly with his powdered wig. "Beckett?" Will asked appearing beside Hailey. "Where's Beckett?" Norrington asked as him and Jack walked up to them. Elizabeth came running in, Tia right behind her. "Did I just hear that Beckett is here?" Hailey pointed and they all crowded in the doorway. Beckett coughed.

"Yes it's me. Stop gawking," he snapped irritably. He shoved the pizza boxes at Hailey. "Here. That's $13.47." Hailey handed him the money. He turned on his heel to leave when Hailey asked, "Wanna stay for pizza?" Beckett sneered at her over his shoulder. "I'd much rather dine with the Kracken." He stepped off the porch and walked over to a van parked at the cub. He got in and it sped off down the street. They all watched it drive away with their mouths hanging open.

* * *

**A/N3:** Sorry for the crappy ending. I'm also sorry if it sounded forced. I had problems writing this chapter because a bunch of other ideas keep popping into my head and they won't stopping gnawing at me!!! Ah! I'm working on another fic right now also. Still in the developing stages though. It shouldn't divert my attention from this one too much so don't worry. Again, sorry if it sounds forced. (I think I might be getting writer's block. Grr...) Please review with comments/criticisms/praises anything really. Flames will be laughed at then deleted. 


	8. The Friends Arrive

**Chapter Title:** The Friends Arrive

**Author:** FlamingRosesInDarkness

**Chapter Summary:** Hailey's friends arrive.

**Warnings: **Elizabeth's cooking and mentions of sedation.

**Disclaimer: **I, of course, do not own PotC. That belongs to Disney, I believe. I also, don't own Alexis. She is the creation of the wonderful DxS Phreak. Don't steal her. I may not own those but I do own Nate, who is Hailey's other friend. Don't steal him either.

**A/N:** I apologize for the major delay. I had writer's block and then Band Camp started and a bunch of stuff is going on in my family so it's been pretty hectic. I've also got school starting on Tuesday so I'll try to post again before then. Again, I'm so sorry but here it is. Read, enjoy and review.

* * *

After their episode with Beckett, the group went into the kitchen to eat the pizza.

Elizabeth set plates out as everyone sat at the table. Hailey put a slice on each plate and passed them out.

Norrington sneered down at his piece. He could hear it sizzling and watched as grease oozed from it, pooling on the plate. He looked around the table.

Hailey had immediately started eating and was already on her third piece. Will had also started eating and found it extremely tasty.

Jack sat next to Norrington, ignoring his pizza and watching Hailey. Elizabeth had cut off a piece with her fork and sniffed it.

She looked over at Hailey who was eating with her hands and smirked. Will would never fall for such a sloppy girl.

She daintily took a bite and chewed slowly. She grinned. "This is great!" she exclaimed. Hailey nodded.

Tia sat next to Elizabeth, not touching her plate and grinning to herself. She looked at Davy who sat across from her, glaring at his pizza. Tia chuckled and Davy turned his glare on her.

Barbossa and Jack (the monkey) sat between Davy and Will. Barbossa was casually picking toppings off his slice and feeding them to Jack.

Norrington sighed and reluctantly took a bite of the greasy monstrosity in front of him. He chewed slowly, swallowed and grudgingly admitted to himself that it was good.

* * *

They all finished eating and adjourned to the living room. They all sat and Hailey asked, "Hey, you guys wanna watch a movie?"Everyone grumbled their assent and she popped a random tape into the VCR. The first notes of Star War: The Phantom Menace played through the speakers. 

A couple of hours later, everyone was asleep in the living room. Except for Davy and Barbossa, who had escaped from the light sabers and small green men who didn't speak with good grammar by going into their rooms and shutting the door.

Hailey slowly opened her eyes and looked around. Her head was resting in Will's lap. She sat up slowly, making sure not to wake up Will, and stretched.

The movie, having finished 30 minutes before, had ejected itself out of the VCR and white noise played on the screen.

She moved to stand when her foot made contact with something soft and fleshy. She looked down.

Norrington lay face down on the floor in front of the couch, one hand outstretched toward the coffee table which Jack was sleeping under.

Norrington shook his head, mumbled in his sleep and turned away from her.

Next to the couch, in a huge armchair, Tia lay curled in a ball, clutching the monkey to her chest. Jack was clawing at her hands, trying to escape from her vice-like grip.

Hailey laughed, stood and, making sure she didn't step on Norrington, left the house.

* * *

Will woke slowly, still clinging futilely to sleep, even as he stood, stretched and headed to the bathroom; stepping on Norrington's hand on the way.

Norrington lifted his head and glared at Will's retreating back. He lowered his head and went back to sleep.

Elizabeth woke up on the floor in front of the TV with a crick in her neck. She stood, stretched and yawned as her stomach growled. She headed into the kitchen and looked for something to make for dinner.

Will exited the bathroom and returned to the living to find Hailey gone. Will's eyes grew wide as he had a mini-panic attack before he realized that she must have gone home. He yawned and entered the kitchen.

Will helped Elizabeth cook dinner then went to rouse the others by either shaking them gently or, in Jack's case, kicking them repeatedly in the stomach until they woke.

"What was that for?" Jack asked, holding his stomach and glaring up at Will.

"Dinner's ready."

After he woke Jack and fetched Barbossa and Davy from their rooms, they all sat down for dinner.

"What is it?" Jack asked, poking the grey, bubbling mass on his plate with a finger.

"Steak and potatoes," Elizabeth answered cheerily. Norrington sneered down at his plate. "Are you sure?" he asked. Elizabeth nodded and took a bite.

Her eyes became really wide and she coughed. "Is it good?" Norrington asked with a raised eyebrow and a knowing smirk.

Elizabeth's eyes watered as she nodded and swallowed. "Wonderful."

Everyone looked at her skeptically but attempted to eat the food anyway.

After dinner, and a couple hours of vomiting, they all decided to turn in for the night.

* * *

The next morning, everything was quiet. Everyone was still asleep.

Suddenly, Hailey burst through the door, nearly ripping it off its hinges. She looked around for someone and, not seeing anyone, ran to Will's room.

She jumped on him and screamed, "Will! Wake up! They're gonna be here soon!"

He sat up and looked at her. "Who is?" he asked, rubbing his eyes and yawning. "My friends! Remember? I told you yesterday."

Realization slugged slowly through Will's mind. Finally, "Oh! Yes, I remember now."

Hailey grinned. "Good, because they're supposed to be here in an hour." She jumped off him and pulled him out of bed.

"C'mon, get dressed. I'll wake everyone else."

She turned to Jack's bed. "Jack," she called quietly, creeping up to his bed. She called again. "Jack. Time to wake up."

She grabbed the blanket and ripped it off him.

Jack sat up and groped for his blanket. "Whas goin' on?" he asked, looking at Hailey with half-lidded eyes.

"It's time to get up," she said with a smile and walked out of the room with his blanket.

He woke up fully then. "Hey! Where're ya goin' with my blanket?"

Hailey yelled something back but he couldn't hear it. He looked over at Will who was slowly getting dressed.

He stood up from his bed, strode over to Will's and jumped under the covers. Will turned around and found Jack in his bed.

"What are you doing?!"

Jack looked up at him with a gold-filled grin and said, "Sleepin'." He turned his back to Will and closed his eyes.

"I don't think so," Will said, ripping the blanket of Jack and throwing him out of the bed. "Not in my bed."

Jack glared up at him. "What was that for?" he asked standing up.

"For dirtying my bed."

Jack look offended. "I am _not _dirty." Will scoffed. "Right."

Will made his bed and left the room. Jack grumbled and got dressed.

* * *

Ten minutes later, everyone was dressed and yawning in the living room.

Barbossa glared over at Hailey. He didn't like the way Hailey had woken him up.

After coming into their room and gently waking Norrington, she'd tried the same with Barbossa.

It hadn't worked so she yelled his name and shook him. That didn't work either.

She thought for a moment and left.

She came back a minute later with a bucket of water. "Barbossa!" she screamed as she threw the water on him.

He sat up grabbed his sword from his bedside table and brandished it at her.

"What the bloody hell are ya doin'?"

Hailey just smiled politely and said, "It's time to wake up." She started to walk out. She stopped at the door, looked back at him and said, "Now you won't have to take a shower today." She walked out.

Barbossa glared at her again and angrily asked, "Why did ya wake us all up this early?" Hailey looked at him and said, "My friends are coming to visit."

Elizabeth looked at her. "What friends?" "I didn't tell you yesterday?"

Everyone but Will shook their heads. "My friends, Lexi and Nate, are flying here to visit for a week."

"So, ya mean to tell me that there'll be another girl runnin' round here that acts just like you?" Jack interjected with a sly smile. Hailey nodded. "Yep."

Then she frowned. "You guys don't mind do you?" Everyone looked at each other and slowly shook their heads.

"Great," Hailey yelled, standing as the door bell rang. "They're here."

* * *

She ran to the door with everyone else trailing behind slowly. Hailey ripped open the door and screamed, "Lexi!"

She paused and asked, "Who are you guys?"

Two men stood on the porch beside a stretcher with Lexi on it. "We're the transport service," one man answered gruffly. "

"Where do ya want her?" the other asked. "In the living room, I guess." The two men nodded and wheeled the stretcher past the group.

Where the two men had been, now stood Nate. Hailey grinned and hugged him. Behind her, Will got an angry look in his eyes and decided he didn't like this Nate boy.

"I'm so glad you guys came." Nate laughed. "Yeah. Me too, now get off me before he rips my head off," he said nervously watching Will.

She let go of him and introduced him to everyone, pointing to each person in turn. "Will, Jack, James, Tia, Elizabeth, Davy, Barbossa, and Monkey Jack meet Nate. Nate meet--"

Nat cut her off before she repeated the long list of names. "It's nice to meet you all," he said, walking past them into the house.

He whistled. "Nice place." He ran a hand through his red hair and grinned.

"What happened to the girl?" Norrington asked. "Oh, that," Nate said with a small frown. "She's afraid of flying so we had to shove a bunch of pills down her throat to get her relaxed enough to fly."

Just then, the two men walked into the room and out the door, wheeling the now empty stretcher between them.

Everyone walked into the living room. The two men had sat Lexi down on the couch. Her head was down, chin resting on her chest.

Jack took a moment and examined the incapacitated girl.

She wore a long-sleeved brown shirt and white linen skirt. Holding up the skirt was a belt with gemstone accents. He couldn't see her face because her dark brown hair blocked his view.

* * *

"Should we wake her?" Hailey asked. Nate shrugged. "Not sure we'll be able to. She took a lot of pills." "Let's try anyway."

"Lexi," Hailey called, shaking her. Lexi's head flopped from side to side.

"Lexi!" Nate screamed, shaking her vigorously. Lexi's head shot up.

"What's with all the screaming?" she asked groggily, slurring her words.

Hailey pulled her up and gathered her into a hug. "Lexi, you're here!" "I'm where?" Lexi slurred, looking around. "Kansas," Nate answered.

Hailey let go of her and Lexi swayed. "Why?"

"Supposedly, you're here to visit, love," Jack said with a flirty smile as he walked over to her.

She looked at him, her eyes glazed over with confusion and narcotics. "Jack Sparrow?" She swayed dangerously and started to fall.

Jack caught her and lifted her bridal style. "Careful, love." He smiled down at her.

Lexi gave him a dazed smile and promptly passed out in his arms.

* * *

There ya have it. Chapter eight. Took awhile for me to get it right. I had to decide what I wanted Nate to look like. I think I've got him just the way I want him now. I have a question for everyone, not that you have to answer or anything but it's been bugging me. I watched High School Musical 2 and at the end of the song 'I Don't Dance' Chad and Ryan switch clothes, why? That seems pretty weird to me. Anyway, reviews would be appreciated. 


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